I am slowly mining gems of peace from the work of reconciling and healing, I must do on my own. According to Reverend Desmond Tutu; healing and reconciliation do not erase the reality of injuries that occur AND forgiveness is not pretending that what has indeed happened did not happen. “Healing does not draw a veil over the hurt.” For a lifetime I have longed for honest reckoning– which consistently has been denied/attacked by those whom I relate to by virtue of birth….And no matter the diminishing words and behaviors, I remain willing to reconcile–with them.”
An invitation to forgive is an invitation to find healing and peace, not to forget or pretend.” My invitation stands- and is as offensive to them today as it was 25 years ago and 2 years ago and 1 year ago. I will pray for the willingness to remain open to the possibilities of healing in my mother’s lifetime with people who show no promise of being able to sustain a presence beyond celebrations and emergencies. Shutting down would be much easier.
Deep sigh. My dahrleeng Greg and my boys share my value for the more difficult aspects of authentic loving connection: healing, repairing, reckoning with pain felt and pain caused. Together we grow in a life that does not feel unnecessarily scary. Raging, annihilating, justifying, betraying, banishing, crusading, ignoring–those are behaviors we find harmful and choose to disengage, when possible. My lil family is tiny and loving and very very forgiving. As human beings, we do upset each other. As spiritual beings, we work fearlessly to amend, repair, strengthen and purify our connections; keeping it wholesome for each of us. Healing and recovering is 100% wholesome and badass; requiring more courage and humility than is humanly possible without immense faith in a power greater than ourselves.
How does your higher power to help you to heal your relationships?