Moving On is Acceptance

Without spiritual recovery, I would still be trying to MAKE people, places and things be different from how they are.  Irresponsible, childish, and damaging; attempting to be a God of sorts-very unwholesome, this I am unlearning and changing.  In spiritual recovery, I am maturing emotionally, learning to accept the things I cannot change and to change the things I can.  I cannot change a person’s behavior or attitude anymore than I can change the weather.  However, I still have choices about where I place myself and to whom and what I get close to.  I will accept that you “do/say  that” and that it hurts me.  Not a problem to solve; an unpleasant fact to accept.

For me acceptance does not begin with a feeling, it begins with me choosing behavior that demonstrates cooperation with a fact of reality, typically an unpleasant fact.  For now, acceptance is a practice.  Behaviors and attitudes are for changing, not other people.  Detachment with love is for people whom I wish all the best and whose attitudes and behaviors are disrespectful and diminishing.  I will totally love you– from over here.  You don’t have to change a thing.  You be you and I’ll be me….love that James Bay song.  Let it Go.  Letting Go is for Badasses.  White Knuckles—umm, not so much.

Much Love,
Magda Gee

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Author: Magda Gee

I am in a program of recovery for those whose lives have been affected by someone else’s drinking, drug use, mental illness. I am new to the experiences of faith and hope and courage, qualities absent for me in proximity to my family. No Contact has been the way to keep safe from diminishing words and actions directed at me. I think I have listened for the last time to how I deserve mistreatment. By holding out for something more wholesome and loving, I have been both banished and demanded to return. I prefer serenity to proximity. I will continue with my program and faith in the best possible outcome, so long as I do my part– to stalk GOD as if my life depends on it.

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4 Comments on "Moving On is Acceptance"

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Magda- Is it ok if I call you that? Much of what I read here feels similar t my life but I never thought of anyone in my life as mentally ill or an addict. Though, if I look closely, I know there are people whose mental health and need for daily substance use has affected me. I don’t know what it means to detach with love or to let other people be, even when the way they live in general conflicts with what I want in my life. I want to recover my spirit. I know it has been… Read more »
Jenn, I’m sure WBA will chime in. But: here’s the awesome thing!! By becoming aware of the problem…’re already on your way! 😊 In order to solve a problem you have to first see that there Is a problem. Many of us have lived blindly, dealing with Others mistreating us, whether they be substance addicts or not, without even acknowledging our own mistreatment…. or worse, ignoring and accepting it. You’re worth more than that, and I say Good For You for seeing and acknowledging even though IT IS difficult. As WBA would say, acknowledging is for Badasses