Month: May 2017

Acceptance, Faith, Intimacy, Musings, Self-Love

No, No Thank you, Unfortunately, That Wont Work

One of the things I have paid most dearly for in my FOO and marriage was speaking my truth/ saying NO.  I became accustomed to screaming, begging, swearing, hysterical threatening…anything to make my NO legit, heard, to make it stick.  These dynamics were sustained for only as long as I would fight or surrender to their will. …

Acceptance, Faith, Intimacy, Musings, Self-Love

Memorial Day 2017-Dying for Peace

While our Memorial Day weekend was lovely in the simplest of ways, I, not so silently, mourn the reality of my “family” situation.  They– are more situational than family. ( hahaha)  But seriously, special days are now, a new kind of hard.  My ex-husband and I worked beautiful healing miracles after our lengthy and litigious divorce, to move …

Acceptance, Faith, Intimacy, Musings, Self-Love

Self Love is the Shit

While it is true that I have tapped into the magic of self love, this by no means is an expression of being perfect or finished or in love with myself.  It means I recognize my worthiness of  connection, wholeness, peace, and kindness of people who value me.   I no longer doubt and dislike myself …

Acceptance, Faith, Intimacy, Musings, poetry, Self-Love

Stay Close to Anything That Makes You Glad to be Alive

What a novel concept!  Learning to be mindful of the choices I have-  sometimes the menu of options sucks, but as an adult with recovery, I do have choices.  For my weekend with sweet sweet Greg, parting only to go to my sweet Brazilian Jiu Jitsu class, I am immensely pleased and grateful.  All my …

Acceptance, Faith, Intimacy, Musings, Self-Love

Starved

Because I experienced trauma around food, I have spent the second half of my life learning to develop a healthy relationship with it.  Still, I find it challenging to eat right foods at right times, in right quantities for right reasons.  I have the metabolism of a hummingbird and so I do need to eat a lot and frequently …

Acceptance, Faith, Intimacy, Musings, Self-Love

The Broken Clock

For 4 brutal decades, I was distraught over the confusing swings of mood(with me indicated as THE cause) by my mother, sister, and later my husband/now ex-husband.  At times there would be eye contact, engaging conversation, and something resembling connection– then long periods of averted eyes and zero acknowledgment when addressed, or a surprising character assassination in response to something …