J Catherine ghoneim Whitney, Musings, Self-Love, Trauma

Nope…I can’t

I cannot help but marvel as I observe so many people unable to give a clear and direct #NO I think the #fear #shame #guilt #aversion speak to the need to APPEAR ūüĎÄ easy going.¬†¬†Keepin it chill– but #noresponse¬†OR 4000 #excuses for why “probably(or even definitively)”¬†¬†you cannot or will not do a thing, is #bullshit¬†needless complexity.¬†¬†I am good with No.¬†¬†

And a solid “Nope” with an extra pop at the end really says it all. ¬†(NŇć‚ÄúP‚ÄĚ ) Those who cannot say no (even when it is 100% the only true answer) also do not tolerate it well.¬†¬†So, #beware and #bereal.¬†¬†Saying No is not mean.¬†¬†Having boundaries and being direct is a time saver and shows respect, though possibly not reverence and submission as required by some. (clearing throat, not naming names or pointing to my #foo) #boundaries and #directCommunication are for
the #wholesome & #badass
But too much for others. #sayno#sayitwithlove

Victims of physical,emotional or sexual trauma will spend a life time learning how to say No without fear. ¬†Perpetrators will find ways to circumvent No and any sort of clear boundaries…. ¬†whatever it takes to have what they feel entitled to. ¬†I guess that is their journey. ¬†Boundary having and respecting is for the wholesome and the badass and too much for others.


Much Love,
Magda Gee

For shorter, more frequent and fun posts, connect with me on Instagram by clicking the pic- Wholesomebadass. https://www.instagram.com/wholesomebadass/

Author: Magda Gee

I am in a program of recovery for those whose lives have been affected by someone else's drinking, drug use, mental illness. I am new to the experiences of faith and hope and courage, qualities absent for me in proximity to my family. No Contact has been the way to keep safe from diminishing words and actions directed at me. I think I have listened for the last time to how I deserve mistreatment. By holding out for something more wholesome and loving, I have been both banished and demanded to return. I prefer serenity to proximity. I will continue with my program and faith in the best possible outcome, so long as I do my part-- to stalk GOD as if my life depends on it.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *