Because we have recovery in our home, we get to practice clarifying, for ourselves and each other, the difference between unpleasant facts and problems.  Before recovery, I believed if something was unpleasant, it was a problem and I must work on it–to change it and make it be different or at the very least punish …

It is horrifying to look back over my life and to reflect on the countless times in which I felt either so indisputably right OR so completely wrong,bad,worthless; like–there was zero gray area between arrogance and humiliation.  Recovery offers me the gifts of humility, faith(the opposite of knowing), and feeds my hunger for constant spiritual …

Why is the requirement to behave with loyalty towards his brother deeply offensive to my younger son? He enjoys his firm command over an arsenal of typically subtle tactics, to make big brother feel sad, confused, or embarrassed—  Little brother is furious with me for requiring loyalty or at least non-malevolence.   He does THIS only …

6:45 a.m.-  It doesn’t even mater why… I woke to crushing anxiety this morning, as I do most, overwhelming, free-floating anxiety tied to nothing in particular and everything all at once.  Nauseous and on the verge of tears, before getting out of bed- I feel immense guilt for how my anxiety robs my sons and …

I am feeling especially aware and grateful for my own acceptance of my deep core truth that I often need to do nothing, absolutely nothing.  Not listening, talking, momming, cleaning, working for money, reading, trolling the internet or  doing yard/house work.  Just BEING.  It is not lazy, it may be depression at times and that is ok and it …