Striving toward Healing, Humility, Courage, and Faith
Even at age 40, pre-recovery, I had not learned/internalized any absolute morals, by which I could hold myself accountable. I thought I did, but honestly, I was stunted, terribly immature in this way— self-propelled and self-seeking. I would do literally anything to guard or retaliate against perceived threat. I learned early on, the brutal principle of “any …
With Greg, boundaries are a non issue, we have compatible operating systems and shared values- prioritizing each other’s peace, comfort and pleasure. Goes without saying, but Sweet Greg is much better at seeing to my needs than I am to his. It is not for lack of awareness on my part, but grief, depression, and …
A little more than 3 years ago, Greg and I began getting to know each other. A hectic time for me, newly relocated from the West Coast, adjusting to constant proximity to my FOO(family of origin) and my ex-husband, working full time, mid-home-buying and moving from our rental of only 3 months, caring for my …
Expressed anger, no matter how true, right, or fairly it is communicated, in my family of origin, causes a person to be rendered crazy, mean, or unstable–THE information is strictly inadmissible, while the recipient of a message containing hard feelings, may uphold the posture of being unaffected, garners sympathy for being victimized and praise for …
I prioritize the closeness and connection of my chosen relationships, holding zero regard for an illusion or status of having said “relationship”. Life is both too long and too short to pretend. I have many swirling thoughts in need of sifting, from the last weeks of church and today’s meeting. For now I have time …
I am now recognizing how, after moving here, if we would have continued as a blended, healing, fixed family with my FOO, my ex, my kids and myself, that would have kept me in some sort of center position, like I would have been at the hub, not in the driver’s seat, but the common …