Striving toward Healing, Humility, Courage, and Faith
A program friend recently asked me if I out my sister to punish her, and cautioned me against it—because that(punishing) would be bad for my recovery (not out of regard for her). I share what happens because finally, I can and I must. Fortunately, what I have to share is observable, undeniable action/behavior, witnessed by …
Daily, I feel tormented by the notion that if I were JUST less sensitive and more forgiving we could be a happy healthy family. But this, THIS is the lie-the myth of the scapegoat and the messaging of abusers. Intense sensitivity is something, that as an adult, I have learned to understand, accept, and to …
Over the past decade, I have become very clear on my lack of desire to surround myself with likeminded people, so much as I do those whom are like-hearted. In fact, it would be terrifying to be surrounded by like-minded others. YIKES In recovery, we call our like-heartedness, unity of purpose, which makes it possible …
Nearly every night between 1 and 4 a.m. , this guy wakes me up to let me know that he needs to go potty. But, if I get up to let him out, I will not fall back to sleep. Instead, I will lay awake agonizing over things which upset me and I will be …
In recovery, I am reminded consistently that we are never victims. This does not mean that people do not intentionally victimize and persecute others, but that we do have choices about how we respond. All choices may be highly undesirable, none the less, they are choices. Like going to a crummy restaurant where you hate …
I do not suck, sometimes my behavior does–but THIS- this alllllwaaaaays sucks. Today is a hard day. I wake up every single day, so painfully aware and deeply affected by the state of my family. I recognize that I do not cause or imagine the dysfunction- and that I alone, cannot repair it. Intellectually and …