I’ve been sitting with a word that has always troubled me, a state of “being” that feels out of reach: happiness. There seems to be so little capacity out there to make space for those of us whose life experiences
When I was young, I experienced needs, feelings, fears, and sensitivities that did not seem commonly shared, well supported, or even allowed. It seems as though that lack of care and support somehow was framed as reflective only of my
A year ago I ended a relationship that I had initially believed was the love of my life. I still kind of feel that way, even though being love bombed is technically not love. It is still my only experience
Observing a year of pain, growth, and resilience — the subtle ways people show up when we are most vulnerable.
I’ve been reflecting on how, in my family—and unironically, in the family of the man I had children with—belonging was not rooted in mutual care, nuance, or individuality. It was rooted in alignment with the people who had decided, and
Letting Go Each day, I live with the ache that I may not see my children again. We may not have another real conversation or moment of closeness. That may be the outcome when children grow in a system that
My sons learned, by design, to have zero tolerance for their mother. Ordinary acts of parenting—direction, correction, consequences, even simple questions—were rejected and reframed as manipulation or control. I once read a message from their father telling them, “Disregard your mother.” And
Looking back, I notice how often I gravitated toward people who couldn’t tolerate my pain but expected the world to organize itself around their pleasure. When they were uncomfortable, everyone rushed to soothe them. What’s especially painful is this: humanity