Without spiritual recovery, I would still be trying to MAKE people, places and things be different from how they are.  Irresponsible, childish, and damaging; attempting to be a God of sorts-very unwholesome, this I am unlearning and changing.  In spiritual recovery, I am maturing emotionally, learning to accept the things I cannot change and to change the things I can.  I cannot change a person’s behavior or attitude anymore than I can change the weather.  However, I still have choices about where I place myself and to whom and what I get close to.  I will accept that you “do/say  that” and that it hurts me.  Not a problem to solve; an unpleasant fact to accept.

For me acceptance does not begin with a feeling, it begins with me choosing behavior that demonstrates cooperation with a fact of reality, typically an unpleasant fact.  For now, acceptance is a practice.  Behaviors and attitudes are for changing, not other people.  Detachment with love is for people whom I wish all the best and whose attitudes and behaviors are disrespectful and diminishing.  I will totally love you– from over here.  You don’t have to change a thing.  You be you and I’ll be me….love that James Bay song.  Let it Go.  Letting Go is for Badasses.  White Knuckles—umm, not so much.