How many fucking times will I have to surrender this?
I cannot stand that she never has to be accountable for her words, her behavior, or the wake of destruction she leaves behind while unflinchingly justifying and defending it all as necessary because of something someone else said or did.
She is incapable of it. Not entirely by her own fault, but because of the culture of our family. Radical nonforgivers can never fully own their own unfortunate and damaging choices because there is always someone else to blame, someone else to punish, someone else who deserves what happened.
There is no intention of setting things right.
The fact that she remains untouched by her own actions still really affects me. Somehow, her refusal to acknowledge her part still awakens the old version of me, the one who wants to step forward and carry all of it, just as I did for so many years.
Nobody wants less pain. They simply demand that everyone ignore more, deny more, and carry more.
Ugh.
Writing this letter gave me the surge of adrenaline I needed to begin this day. Thank you, Jilan.
1.5 hours later….still cookin 
Yours Truly,
Magda Gee♥
