For me, survival mode has felt like living under the weight of an ever-growing, tangled mess.

Every unsettling interaction compounded it. I couldn’t untangle it, and I couldn’t leave it alone.

After decades of debilitating confusion, I’m finally recognizing patterns and finding ways to organize my experiences. The mess hasn’t disappeared, but it’s loosening its grip on me.

I missed so much of my life trying to figure out what had just happened and worrying about what might happen next. I’m beginning to see how life could be more.