How to Alienate Others and Die Completely Alone
A Working Draft
Introduction
I used to believe relationships failed because of misunderstanding.
This is my attempt to document how I learned they fail faster when you insist on a shared understanding.
Proven Alienation Accellerants
Step One: Take Everything Seriously
Assume words mean things.
Assume patterns matter.
Assume what hurts once will hurt again.
Respond with directness.
Step Two: Ask for Clarification
When something feels off, say so.
When it still feels off, say it again — more carefully this time.
Use sentences like:
- “Can we talk about what just happened?”
- “That didn’t land well for me.”
- “I’m hurting.”
This will make people tired.
Step Three: Confuse Discomfort With Harm
Fail to understand that making someone uncomfortable is more problematic than being hurt.
Persist in believing that pain should be addressed instead of silenced.
Notice when people withdraw.
Misinterpret that as something to explore rather than a warning.
Step Four: Believe Repair Is a Thing
Assume relationships bend instead of snap.
Assume naming a rupture invites care instead of retaliation.
Wait for accountability that is never coming.
Decline reconcilliartion without repair.
Reject coercion disguised as “confusion” or “concern”
This is where momentum builds.
Step Five: Keep Showing Up as Yourself
Do not read the room fast enough.
Do not learn when to soften, shrink, or disappear.
Continue speaking in full sentences when fragments would suffice.
Remain available, clear, and boundaried.
Remain earnest.
People will begin to agree you are the problem.
Step Six: Get Labelled as “A Lot”
Be described, vaguely, as:
- intense
- emotional
- difficult
- negative
Note that no one can point to a specific event.
Accept that your personality is now the evidence.
Step Seven: Try Harder
Explain yourself better.
Use fewer words.
Then more precise ones.
Then fewer again.
Apologize for the impact.
Then for the tone.
Then for existing in a way that requires conversation.
Watch nothing improve.
Step Eight: Be Surprised by the Outcome
Be shocked when:
- silence is preferred to dialogue
- honesty and belonging are mutually exclusive
- absence of observable difficulty is framed as peace
Marvel briefly that love was conditional on compliance.
Conclusion
If you want to alienate others efficiently,
believe that relationships are places where things can be directly addressed.
If you want to ensure solitude,
refuse to learn how to erase any trace of your unique experience and existence. I find myself at an impasse with my historical relationships. All taking the same shape—the kind I was conditioned, programmed, and groomed to choose and accept.
This space is a sanctuary, a place where we cannot be silenced or erased. If my experiences or sentiments resonate with you and you feel like sharing or connecting, please feel free to reach out. No pressure, always, I’m down to listen. Message me anytime 🤍🤍🤍 wholesomebadass@gmail.com
