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The Emotional Person Is Always the Problem

I am a survivor studying the wreckage, noticing a pattern.
When a person is being harmed, a mountain of tidy evidence is demanded—transcripts, videotapes, witnesses, perfectly composed testimony—and even then, it is rarely sufficient.

Meanwhile, the person with the well-fitting mask and an image to manage says, “I didn’t do it. The emotional person is clearly troubled.”
And the world responds, “Okay. We believe you.”

In a system where sucking it up and smiling is the only rewarded behavior, a reasonable question emerges:
Who is more likely to be misrepresenting the truth?

The person shackled by the humiliation of bleeding out—a position that offers no social gain and constant judgment?
Or the person who has everything to lose if the mask slips?

I am not proud of the desperation in my archives.
But I am not ashamed of being destabilized by a system designed not to protect me. One which says- you can destabilize a person (cue: coercive control) and then point to their destabilization as THE issue. No. Just no.


This space is a sanctuary, a place where we cannot be silenced or erased.  If my experiences or sentiments resonate with you and you feel like sharing or connecting, please feel free to reach out.  No pressure, always, I’m down to listen. Message me anytime 🤍🤍🤍 wholesomebadass@gmail.com

Magda Gee

I am in a program of recovery for those whose lives have been affected by someone else's drinking, drug use, mental illness. I am newly learning faith, hope, and courage, practices not witnessed by me, in my childhood, with my family. Sadly, No Contact, as a last resort, is how I keep safe from diminishing words and actions directed at me. I think I have listened for the last time to how I deserve mistreatment. By holding out for something more wholesome and loving, I have been both banished and demanded to return. I prefer serenity to proximity. I will continue with my program and faith in the best possible outcome, so long as I do my part-- to stalk GOD as if my life depends on it.