The House Rules
I am never wrong. Never out of line. Never erring in judgment. Never lacking in kindness, patience, or grace. It is unwise to suggest otherwise.
I am not responsible for my own difficulties. Nor for the pain of others. And therefore, I am not sorry.
I am always the hero. Or the victim.
You must sense that you are impressed by me. Threatened by me, even. Charmed by me. Seeking my approval. Desperate to avoid my discontent.
You will smile warmly. You will appear content and unaffected in my presence. Or else.
You will not recall or speak of my less favorable words or actions. Or else.
You will make me look and feel good. Or else.
You will not trouble me with needs, feelings, or realities that inconvenience me.
You are either with me—in complete agreement and support—or against me.
If you challenge me, question me, or obstruct what I desire—what I deserve—you will suffer.
You know the rules.
I will come for you. I will make you pay. And then I will justify it. Or deny it.
Your choices exist only in how they reflect on me. You may be yourself—but only when it serves me.
Your safety depends on my comfort.
I decide who belongs and who is excluded. I decide who is connected and who is erased.
When it suits me, I will gift and flatter you. When it doesn’t, I will criticize and abandon you.
You will never understand what you did to earn my favor—or lose it.
Making you responsible for my moods is how I avoid facing myself.
Your usefulness is your only protection.
It is always up to you.
Sound familiar?
Get to a meeting. Any Alcoholics Anonymous meeting will do.
You will find help there. Hope. Connection. Truth.
