generational trauma

Read more about the article Beyond Conflict: Identifying the Patterns of Coercive Control in Family Dynamics
Abuse is often framed as a 'loss of control,' but true loss of control doesn't have an audience. If someone is only abusive when there are no witnesses, they aren't losing control—they are exercising it. This selectivity is the clearest evidence that the behavior is a choice, not a mistake.

Beyond Conflict: Identifying the Patterns of Coercive Control in Family Dynamics

Coercive control is a strategic pattern of behavior used to dominate another person and strip away their sense of autonomy. It is not defined by a single violent event, but by…

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Read more about the article When “What Are You So Angry/Upset About?” Isn’t Actually Concern
Visible distress is treated as a failure of character. Composure is mistaken for truth, credibility, and strength.

When “What Are You So Angry/Upset About?” Isn’t Actually Concern

I’m finally recognizing how validity gets measured not necessarily by the truth of what’s said, but by the composure of the person saying it. My sister recognized this dynamic early…

Continue ReadingWhen “What Are You So Angry/Upset About?” Isn’t Actually Concern
Read more about the article Dissent and Discipline: Understanding Family Dynamics
“If you’re not at the table, you’re probably on the menu.” Recognizing patterns of exclusion, scapegoating, and manipulation in families and groups helps illuminate how power imbalances and binary thinking target those who speak up or stand apart.

Dissent and Discipline: Understanding Family Dynamics

The Binary World I Grew Up In In my family, things weren’t simply liked or disliked—they were either the best or the worst. No middle ground, no “not for me.”…

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