I can own my part. I cannot own yours too.
When Accountability Goes Only One Way
For more than 40 years, I didn't really know how to exist inside a relationship unless I was the broken one, bowing in reliance to anyone gracious enough to let…
No matter how many times it was demanded I lighten up, calm down, go with the flow and get over it, I just still did not.
"Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know." — Pema Chödrön
Making Sense of Life Through Patterns
With all of the therapy, writing, reading, reflection, and somatic work, a lot is coming up for me. Memories. Patterns. Correlations that I had not previously made. I am finding…
When the aggressor occupies the protected position, the injury is not limited to the original harm. The protection becomes part of the injury.
The Protected Position
Something began when I was four years old, and it was reinforced, repeated, normalized, and sustained over the course of decades. The injury wasn't only the abuse itself. It was…
Some moments are confusing. Some conversations are messy. But repeated patterns have a way of revealing the emotional climate of a relationship. This realization changed the way I understand connection, accountability, and self-trust.
If a Fly on the Wall Had Been There
Memory Memory can be unreliable. Interpretation certainly is. Two people can experience the same interaction and leave with very different narratives about what happened. What feels more meaningful to me…
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