How Upsetting for Children
Thank God for Restraint…….as I surely had none before program. While I will no longer jump in the ring, the 
temptation to react to degrading comments is immense. The boys’ dad just came with his sister to pick up our children, and I asked if the schedule for our Tuesday dinner visit had been changed. When he answered yes. I said “No problem, in the future, can you let me know when you make plans for them on my scheduled time?”. Verfuckenbatim! PS-this is the second request of this nature in the last 2 weeks. I will continue asking nicely. I won’t fight about it and I will not pretend for a moment, that it is acceptable.
And his sister sneered and said in front of our boys “on and on she goes” …going on about what, requesting pertinent information and respect for our legal agreement, and serenity for myself and my boys? Yes, L, I do…and I will continue to request it no matter how you object. So grateful for enough recovery to have only, quietly uttered. while closing the door–“Your behavior is impressive” Mostly because I know she beleives she is impressive for reasons of which I remain unaware. Kindness and benevolence are the most impressive things. by this measure, I have not been impressed in the way in which may be desire. The perpetual triangulation is impressive, just not in appositive way. Unrecovered me was tempted to say: “Please shut up” “And consider the gift of an unexpressed thought, particularly when unwholesome…ummmmkkkkaaaaay? Loving Aunts people do not impose this conflict on their innocent nephews, where it can be avoided. Check yourself.” (more…)
Birthday sentiments to my female sibling who believes that being grossed out by sex is the same as being a lady. And who speaks of being phobed about by lesbians(a-hem) and worries constantly that she looks like one. I found the perfect card for you. Also, Thank you for getting born. If not for you, and wanting you to love ?me so badly, I would never have married someone just like you??And I would not have my two sons. 
connection, wholeness, peace, and kindness of people who value me. I no longer doubt and dislike myself enough to subject myself to the painful brand of love-and I have for now stopped begging for it to be different, with my family of origin. Without self-love, I was willing to come around, to dine with people who name call and behave in ways which are diminishing to me- creating unnecessary hardship and loss of innocence for my children. I realize how I came to marry my children’s father, emotionally and morally vacant, concerned primarily with appearances. Not knowing what being loved and nurtured felt like, I chose more of what I knew. As I have recovered; learned what it means to offer, receive, and welcome wholesome love and nurturing, I no longer tolerate or take blame for others whose behaviors and words I experience as foul.