vulnerability

Tension persists as my boys’ father, actively defies our legally binding custodial settlement.  Feeling even more above the law, now cozy with my sister(married to a judge).  My ex’s continued withholding information regarding changes by him for plans with our boys during my scheduled time, as well as relevant health information is hostile.  He seems hungry for a reaction, a lecture, or snarky comment by me.  Not happening.  I may however, say, in front of our children,  “Hey, when making plans for the boys during their week with me, please talk to me about it first. ” #kthanksbye.  The reason for saying it in front of them is so they may witness that what I say about him is what I will say to him, alignment of my words, actions, and principles!!!  This is recovery and progress for which I feel immensely proud.  From what I have read, the abuse that follows having a clear and sane boundary is standard reaction by those affected with NPD and untreated addiction issues.  In my FOO and marriage, making a clear request or statement of my limits was always the beginning of a cold war. (more…)