The Part Where You Fucked Up
Rightness Over Goodness The tribal tension in our country right now is a perfect parallel to the dynamic of my family of origin—overflowing with remarkable efforts toward rightness and victory…
Trying to raise good citizens. Honest. Kind. Faithful. Humble.
Rightness Over Goodness The tribal tension in our country right now is a perfect parallel to the dynamic of my family of origin—overflowing with remarkable efforts toward rightness and victory…
Last week my older son was initiated by a new neighbor boy, whom we do not know—even a little. This neighbor decided to “come out” via text message, to my…
Daily, I feel tormented by the notion that if I were JUST less sensitive and more forgiving we could be a happy healthy family. But this, THIS is the lie-the myth of the scapegoat and the messaging of abusers. Intense sensitivity is something, that as an adult, I have learned to understand, accept, and to accommodate without shame. My mental wellness requires that I offer space to anyfuckenbody who judges sensitivity and uses it as an excuse to be unkind–shaming. I do regret that I had nobody to teach me this sooner. Self acceptance, preservation, kindness to myself and to others—these things, they were first introduced to me as a 40 something woman, in recovery. And I forgive myself for not knowing what I didn’t know, before I knew it and I forgive myself for not accepting poor treatment as the price of membership for a club to which I clearly do not belong. And I forgive myself for not being able to forgive before I am able. (more…)
I have been finding healing and comfort in re-reading and listening to When Bad Things Happen to Good People( a book I first borrowed from my mother, after my father's…