Valentines Day Perfection- Until….

Nearing the end of a beautiful Valentines’s Day with my sweetheart, I posted this Vlog to Facebook in an effort to share something light and fun as I have been advised as best practice…light and fun.

And then, I was prompted by a tv commercial to initiate a heated political conversation in which I know we will strongly disagree. I was a beast trying to beat him into submission. I see that it was my fearful thinking that his ballot meant he was a selfish racist,bigot, fucker, while no part of his behavior has ever indicated anything close.  In the end, I just asked him to promise me that we will always be people that help those most in need.  And he said Of course, that is who we are. So no matter who the president is, it does not change the man I know him to be. It was my fear that made me behave poorly and unkindly. Thankfully, a program friend talked me down from that place of judgment.   My behavior was deranged.  I am so grateful to know and do better, even more so when I remember to.

Magda Gee

I am in a program of recovery for those whose lives have been affected by someone else's drinking, drug use, mental illness. I am newly learning faith, hope, and courage, practices not witnessed by me, in my childhood, with my family. Sadly, No Contact, as a last resort, is how I keep safe from diminishing words and actions directed at me. I think I have listened for the last time to how I deserve mistreatment. By holding out for something more wholesome and loving, I have been both banished and demanded to return. I prefer serenity to proximity. I will continue with my program and faith in the best possible outcome, so long as I do my part-- to stalk GOD as if my life depends on it.