Dear Mother,
You must be pleased that I married someone emotionally and morally similar to you and to my sister? And equally contented that YOUR family shows unyielding loyalty to your will and way in the form of continued stonewalling. Rest in peace. Someone should.
What was my crime again…Oh, I learned to say No to bullshit without screaming and swearing and I refused to actively engage in a war that you all insisted on and have the nerve to ask directly, repeatedly, and without shame why you all so readily hurt me? I know the answer now, because that is the best you can do. While you may have banished me, and that hurts like hell, probably forever…the truth is I do not belong with people capable of this. I am definitely not one of you.
I am breaking the cycle, mourning the footing of the bill, by my children–for the continued and imposed spiritual and emotional sickness. Oh how I do miss the gorgeous 2500 miles between here and California but am eternally grateful that your physical illness and Randy’s desire to buy a home, brought us here. Even with the grief of your triangulation with the boys’ father, the pain you all bring, means little compared to the healing love of my sweet Greg and Favorite. I could not live without them. In a way, you and R are responsible for that also. So thanks!
Always,
