In the two years since my boys’ dad started his on-again, off-again relationship with this woman, she’s attempted a number times to get on my radar. I don’t fully understand it. I try not to assume motives because, I can’t know what’s truly going on in someone else’s mind.
Now that my sons have their own cars and can drive themselves between their dad and me, there’s no need for communication with him. I have no reason to engage with her—I’ve never met or communicated with her. Yet, it seems important to her to get my attention.
I can’t know if she wants to share something, or simply needs to be noticed.
If I sensed that her interest in connecting with me came from a place of wholesomeness, or if there was a chance that a conversation between us could bring healing to either of us, I’d be open to it. I will always be happy to participate in healing, especially with someone who impacts my children’s lives.
I imagine we probably have more in common than either of us would care to admit. I was tall, thin, attractive, doing well professionally, with more resources and assets than he had—yet still filled with enough self-loathing to try and make it work with someone who made me feel terrible. He’s driven to gain access to women with low self-esteem, who will trade being single for being with a man who takes everything they have, offering nothing good in return except for consistent cycles of intermittent reinforcement—just enough to keep them hanging on and trying harder.
I do feel for her.
Okay, I’m officially aware that I really need to get a life so I can have genuinely interesting things to write about.
