Just Another List
Qualities which I treasure, not like I am compelled to get to know or call a person a friend, or enter into a relationship, just a deep respect and appreciation…
Unfit
Any form of antihistamine, the smallest dose results, for me, in emotionally violent nightmares. Even antihistamine eye drops, which seems unreasonable, since they are not ingested, dammit. Desperate for relief…
Goals
When I mentioned to Sweet Greg last weekend how uncomfortable I am with the 25 extra pounds I have been carrying for the last 4 years. He said: “When you…
Why I Did IT
Why I Did IT Why did I marry a man who made me feel unsafe, unlovable, unworthy of comfort or acknowledgment? Because it was the kind of love I was…
The Non-Redeemable
As I watch and try to untangle and make sense of what is happening, I see how those who need to feel admired will frequently and relentlessly cast a person…
Get Well Soon—PLEASE
To the people who were older and on whom I relied to teach me about love, trust, and connection: The messaging that your encampment in your ways was more important…
60 Year Old Bearded Alcoholic Girlfriend
From our first email(we met online),phone call, and meeting and all of the days that followed, I felt on edge and scared. And that was familiar. Anxiety had been my…
Maybe I Am
I see now how my ability to develop or pursue creativity or ambition of any sort, was stunted. I became crazed by my need for vigilance, and wasted from the…
Perfection v. Self Reflection
There are folks (those who are perfect and infallible- the blamers, accusers, hustlers, takers, the entitled, and delusional) unable to to say or think any of the following: I made…
The House Rules
I am never wrong, out of line, erring in judgment, lacking in kindness, patience, grace. It is ill advised to suggest otherwise. Nor am I responsible for my own difficulties…
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