Author: Magda Gee

This author has written 587 articles

Take Time for Creativity

For the first time in almost 2 years, I am able to mentally settle down enough to look through and work in my altered books.  My soulmate-best friend, who came to me late in life and at exactly the right time, is an art therapist.  For yeeeears, she ♥harassed ♥me to craft with her and I REFUUUUUUSED- unwilling AND uncertain that I could produce anything enjoyable or respectable.  My first surrender to her art torture was a collage.  I actually created a vision board(which feels queer for me to even say) and in the hours and days of harvesting suitable images, I discovered what was important to me, about me.  I fell in love with the process. With anything I “create”, I tend to be critical and ambivalent about my finished work.(Previously learned, self-limiting attitudes I am now unlearning)  When I look at anything drawn, colored, painted, copied, pasted, or even cooked by me, I can see the white knuckles and the fear all over it, my intensity– and that WAS painful to acknowledge.  I do not love being intense…but now I own it and enjoy closeness with those who appreciate it and distance from those who judge.  It is how and who I am.  In-tense! (more…)

Continue ReadingTake Time for Creativity

Wake The Fuck Up

First off, I will say that yelling and saying FUCK is neither wholesome nor badass.  This is a point of departure for me, not my final destination.  I am a work in progress…Unlearning and reparenting myself requires revisiting the pain from the past which threatens to haunt the present if I do not identify and unhook from the myths of my childhood experience. (more…)

Continue ReadingWake The Fuck Up

Kindness v. Friendliness

RE: Greg’s kindness:  S2 asked  “Is he that way because his parents are like that?”.  My response segued nicely into expansion of my own “family” experience.  Any excuse at all will do!  Feigning diplomacy, I shared how having grown up with the intense harshness of my childhood home left me lacking any understanding of authentic kindness and gentleness.  I still cannot help but marvel at kind, respectful, gentle natured people.  Intentional and undiscriminating kindness is a rare practice which I strive daily to bring into our focus and existence.  Kindness is in the little things we say and do(or not).  Before recovery, I believed that kindness was reserved for the “worthy”.  In recovery, I have learned we are each worthy of kindness and connection, even at our worst, especially at our worst.  Kindness is always the answer, and has nothing to do with tolerating abuse or being friendly/flattering(gag).   “There is nobody on earth more important than you…and there is nobody on this earth less important than you.”  I find myself repeating this regularly to my children and to myself.  (more…)

Continue ReadingKindness v. Friendliness